A first email should be short, funny, original, and creative.
It’s a bit counterintuitive, but if your first instinct is to compliment him and explain your value, you’re not demonstrating that you have any value.
Once you put a man on a pedestal, he’s automatically looking down at you.
There is nothing inherent about initiating an email conversation that screams out “desperate”.
However…Where most women screw up that first email contact is by taking one of two approaches: 1) telling him how great he is, or 2) explaining why you’re great and why he should write back to you.“But…doesn’t that just about cover it? ”Presuming you’ve had a man write to you before, is it really all that interesting when he tells you that he thinks you’re cute?
Here is my question: Are men ok with women sending introductory emails to them? In some ways, I see a email hello similar to a come-hither look at a bar, etc.
but in other ways it seems very aggressive and therefore a turnoff to most men. Dear Jane, Your question brings up two of the most common mistakes that women make in online dating:1) Waiting for Men to Write to You First 2) Telling Him What You Like About His Profile First things first: Men LOVE it when women write to them. If you have an attractive photo, interesting essay, and you’re in his target demographic, why WOULDN’T he be excited to hear from you?
Even if a guy reads your entire profile and respond to one specific line, do you really get excited by a man who says, “I notice you like skiing. Then why would you write an email like that to a man?
I’m really grateful, Jane, that you made that connection between a first email and a come-hither look at a bar.
To give you an idea of what NOT to send, here are 3 messages we actually sent to women online.
Just make sure to change some of the personal information. Read through her profile first and replace the necessary information to match certain things she said in her profile. The bad news is I haven’t met one single woman on this site that was worth my time, and I’m not even all that picky! Respond to this email and I’ll tell you what the good news is.
The test can be a simple question (see the examples below).