And, though I am not saying that led to our divorce, it certainly didn’t help the state of our marriage, it was another nail in the coffin.Reply I know multiple people who have had troubles hiding the engagement ring purchase from their girlfriend!
(I guess having a total he can keep in his mind makes him conscious of the fact that he doesn’t have an unlimited amount of money to spend! Anything from our personal budgets or that is already part of our monthly budget (which we keep on Mint) can be bought without question. Since he generally spends his entire personal budget every month and I rarely spend money on myself, I try to avoid telling him how much is in my personal budget because it’s usually like… I check Mint every morning so I see all the purchases, and he never carries cash.
Anything else requires a check-in with the other person. (This is actually a point of contention because we usually have some cash at home but he NEVER remembers to take it when he needs it…
Also, you’d think that jewellery stores would be USED to that by now? Reply My answers for 1, 2 and 3 are the same as yours. I have a small savings stash because — even though the “experts” say it’s not ok — I think women need to have some cash stowed away for a rainy day apart from what the hubby knows about.
I had it before we got married and don’t intend to touch it, but I think of it as my money. Neither of us had any major financial problems going in (we met freshman year of college), but spending time with each other’s families the first year made it clear that we came from different financial backgrounds, and we did talk about that.
I find it wrong period and besides he’s my best friend.
I won’t even hide Christmas gifts from him, because I get too excited about what I purchase for him.
In reality that isn’t a bad thing, because first, I don’t have to lie to him or hide a secret and second, I buy stuff early and on sale so by the time Christmas rolls around we both have forgotten what is wrapped under the tree. Then we get some cash each month to spend, but we usually talk about that too, probably just to not feel stupid about purchasing dumb things, like clothes we don’t need, or a new phone.
:) And to the rest, I do the budget and we always talk about purchases. Reply #5 is funny, because my fiance and I actually discussed it in the contex of what we would do if someone cheated. My checking pays for my personal bills, my debts from before we got married, plus a little extra.
He asked me if I had any money saved and I said “Nope.” Good or bad? We also discussed our spending/saving habits early on (he was a spender, me a saver).
Actually, while we were in college we set up an account at the credit union on campus in my name into which he would deposit money, so he couldn’t spend it! We have only joint accounts, but we each get a month of personal spending money, plus any birthday or Christmas gifts go toward our personal totals.
I wanted to go down there and strangle them, though she never figured it out, it was nerve wracking!